When the relationship is just beginning, lovers think that they will have "not like everyone else." Let others quarrel over trifles, and they will always be happy.
Time passes, and happiness becomes less. Mutual reproaches begin, disputes over trifles, disagreements, scandals.
What is the matter? Does love go so fast? Man and woman are trying to find answers to these questions. Although it seems that they still love each other, but relations are deteriorating more and more.
The fact is that lovers only enjoy their happiness, they live and do not think about the need to work on relationships. The situation will not be corrected if you do not make efforts.
If you want to improve relations with your husband / wife, first stop making the most common mistakes. After a while, you will be surprised to see that your chosen one has become better towards you.
10. Bias
This mistake is made by most people. They begin to be biased towards their soulmate.
For example, a wife thinks that her husband is cheating on her. She seeks in his behavior the slightest deviations from the norm. The husband decided to go in for sports, gave flowers - the wife is not happy, this is for her direct signs of treason.
A husband’s attitude to his wife may become biased if all his relatives convince that his chosen one got married solely because of financial gain.
There can be many examples, but all of them are similar in that a person invents a problem for himself and tries to find supporting signs in the behavior of his beloved person.
Stop looking for a problem where it does not exist. Remember, the thought is material, do not attract the bad into your life.
9. Hasty actions
No one is safe from rash acts, but before you say or do something, think about how it will affect your relationship. Very often, carelessly spoken words cause a divorce.
A person after the past time understands how much he offended a soul mate. Even in a fit of anger, think about how your words will affect your relationship. Be attentive to your actions.
If you are no longer free, do not provoke jealousy, flirt with everyone. The scandal is provided, in addition, your chosen one will cease to trust you. Take in the habit: think first, and then do or say.
8. Late clarification of relations
In order for people to understand each other, it is necessary to talk about problems. Most partners prefer to hush up the problem. When the chosen one has done what you do not like, tell him about it. Otherwise, you will have to be silent and endure. You will not be able to hold out for long, sooner or later you will “explode”.
On a man who, by the way, is sure that everything is fine, a stream of reproaches and claims will fall. It's only too late, and it is unlikely that your chosen one will be able to change something. You want your relationship to bring only joy, learn to talk and find out the relationship on time.
7. The desire to change others
Most people are confident that they will be happy if the partner changes. They begin to act actively.
Someone writes a favorite to a fitness club, which gained a few extra pounds. Someone sets as an example the wife of a friend who successfully does business, keeps the whole house on herself and gives birth to children along the way. Women act much easier: they begin to "cut" their chosen one. Do not try to change your partner.
You yourself have chosen it. He has long been out of childhood and does not need to bring him up. Want your partner to change? Start with yourself, set a positive example, maybe it will support your endeavors.
6. Unwillingness to listen
Often problems in relationships begin because people cannot listen. They are in the clouds, for the hundredth time they scroll through the head with a boss or a quarrel with a colleague. At this time, your chosen one shares his problems with you.
A close person needs support, advice, approval, and you just nod your head absentmindedly. People are indifferent to each other. Remember how it all began, then you did not interrupt your chosen one, did not try to impose your point of view on him, did not let his words pass by. You had a dialogue.
Nothing prevents you from sitting down and talking. Drop unnecessary thoughts and listen to your loved one so that next time you don’t blush when he says: “I told you so.”
5. Inability to see own flaws
Everyone has disadvantages. But as they say: "In the eyes of another ...". Do not look for flaws in your partner, do not try to fix it. Work on yourself. Think about what you don’t like about yourself, what prevents you from building a happy relationship.
Maybe this is excessive emotionality or grumbling, inability to control oneself. Try to change yourself, and you will succeed.
If the shortcomings of your partner are pissing you off, talk to him, give him a hint about the problem, just do it delicately.
4. Do not think about the feelings of others
If your partner is dear to you, you should think about his feelings. You already understand how badly a rash act or phrase can hurt. Before you do something, think about how it will take your soulmate.
Try to put yourself in his place. Of course, your and his perceptions can differ significantly. If you have been together for a long time, you have to guess what your loved one will feel.
3. Unshakable own point of view
If one of the partners always stubbornly stands its ground, such an alliance will not last long. You must learn to negotiate and find a solution that will suit both.
If your partner is weaker than you psychologically, he will always give in. Nothing good will come of it. If he is the same as you, the struggle and “pulling the blankets” will begin.
The big mistake in the relationship is that a person tries to impose his views on his beloved. Special tact should be shown in matters relating to parents, relatives, religion, personal beliefs.
2. Misperception of other people
Each person is individual, and you do not need to think that your partner has the same outlook on life. Quarrels may begin due to trifles.
Do you like Chinese cuisine, and he is Italian. Every time you are going to a restaurant, you start arguing. Nobody is inferior, as a result you stay at home, disperse in different angles and take offense at each other. This is the simplest example.
You must understand that your partner has a completely different point of view and that which pleases you, he will not necessarily like it. Accept it for what it is.
1. Think only about yourself
Relationships will never be harmonious if partners only think about themselves. If you put yourself in the first place, the partner will soon get tired of it. Most people consider themselves a “gift of fate” for their chosen one, but in reality this is not so.
It is unlikely that you have an angelic character, good looks, exceptional mental abilities and an enviable financial position. If you do not possess all of the above, then you are an ordinary person, of which there are many. Go down from heaven to earth.
You have learned to demand, now learn to give. Rejoice your chosen one, pamper him, do it disinterestedly, then he will answer you the same.